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Am I Enough? Confessions of a Serial People Pleaser

Do you ever ask yourself the question… “Am I Enough?”

If you do, you're certainly not alone. Let's talk to you about the things that may cause you to ask yourself the question “Am I Enough?” and how to address them so they don’t end up holding you back.

Being a People Pleaser

As a female entrepreneur I have a bit of a stigma with this topic and if you’re anything like me you’re probably in the same boat. I affectionately refer to myself as a “Recovering People Pleaser”.

Being a people pleaser usually is accompanied by an overwhelming feeling of guilt, if your compelled to make everyone happy at the same time. And that guilt can feel like it’s massively amplified when you try to overcome this compulsion.

What most people pleasers have in common is an almost uncontrollable habit of saying “YES” to absolutely everyone and everything that they feel might need their undivided attention, regardless of whether or not it causes their own needs to be put on the back burner.

It may stem from a lack of self confidence. Like, if you don’t fall all over yourself trying to please everyone, someone might get upset about it and not like you or will be mad at you, and this makes you incredibly uncomfortable.

What you need to remember is YOU are important too! The needs of the masses DO NOT rest entirely on your shoulders. The world will continue to spin even if you drop the proverbial ball and someone ends up disappointed.

This might be a hard pill to swallow, but you REALLY don’t need to please everyone.

Being a Yes Man (Or Woman…)

Now sometimes, when you’re just starting out in business, that urge to say yes to absolutely every single opportunity is even greater than you might be used to.

When your business is in it’s early stages, you’re probably going to be very tempted to say yes to absolutely every request you get. You may feel if you don’t say yes, that you might be missing out on opportunities or that you aren’t being enough for everyone. But from my experience with this… because remember, I’m a “RECOVERING” people pleaser… I found that the more I said yes to what EVERYONE wanted, the less I was staying true to what I wanted MY business to become.

In the beginning, I had a vision for what type of business I wanted to build, but because I was letting others drive me, it caused me to morph my business around what they wanted.

By allowing this to happen, my product line and my website became so convoluted and so confusing that it actually began to drive potential customers away, because I’d lost focus on what my store meant to me and the clients I had originally intended to serve.

 And it wasn’t until I pulled back on the reigns, refined my product line and completely restructured my website to be more focused on what I originally wanted it to be, that I finally saw an upturn in my web traffic & sales.

By finally saying NO to the things that didn’t truly fit my brand, it niched down my product focus to deliver a more specific product line to my ideal clients.

What you’re offering to the world will always be enough when you’re truly being authentically you. So please people by making sure you’re happy first.

The whole point of reaching for your goals to becoming a successful entrepreneur is to make your life better after all.

And by trying to please everyone, you’ll just end up pleasing NO ONE, including yourself.

In part 2 of this series I’m going to be leaning into this topic of “Am I Enough?” a bit more where I discuss having the right education level to be an entrepreneur. You might be surprised at what that answer is…

Take me to Part 2!

Do you struggle with trying to please everyone? What types of things have you tried that have worked for you?

 

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